I haven't felt this way in a long time. When I was 22, my dad retired from GE and sold the house in Anderson that I grew up in. I graduated from college and got an actual 8-5 day job where I didn't have to punch a time clock and had health insurance. I rented a cute little 1-bedroom apartment in Ft. Thomas, bought my own furniture and decorated my new space. My parents, whom I never thought of as "old," bought a condo and started spending their winters in Florida. I earned a master's degree, lost a job, and moved back in with my parents, whom I realized were officially old. I woke every morning during my early 20s and felt the earth spinning out of control as the days passed more quickly than I could handle. My life was changing, fast.
After a few years of what seemed like constant change, I settled into my life, and the earth's rotation slowed down enough for me to enjoy it. I got a good job, rented an apartment with two bedrooms, found the love of my life, lost the love of my life, got a promotion, rented an even better apartment, lost 100 pounds, found another love of my life, lost love again, and ran a marathon. For some reason, those big changes didn't seem so big. Through all those experiences, I felt sturdy, grounded and in full control of my decisions.
****
Last week, I bought new running shoes. Such a minor thing, I know, but it set off something inside me that I didn't know was there. I'm not running in the shoes that I ran my first marathon in anymore. I'm keeping my old pair, of course, as a memento of my accomplishment, but they've been retired. The chapter of my life involving my first pair of Adidas Supernovas has come and gone, and that makes me sad. But, as I inspected the new pair yesterday, I considered the possible stories their journey would tell. Where would these shoes go? How many times would I run up the hill on Gilbert in these? Would I slosh through a pop-up rain shower in them? How fast could I go in them? As I wondered what was ahead for my new shoes, and looked at those clean, springy new Supernovas, I realized that I wasn't just thinking about shoes.
I learned this week that Meters & Miles is being sold, and will soon turn into a Running Spot. I'm so sad that I will be losing the place (and the people) that helped me acheive one of the greatest accomplishments of my life. On the other hand, I'm looking forward to seeing how it all turns out, and to the new opportunities and different experiences I may have when the store changes hands.
Outside of my running life, too, changes are all around me. My brother Nick is getting married and moving to a new house waaaay out in Milford. I see my friends, too, moving in with significant others, getting married, buying homes and having kids. When did they all grow up? I'm changing too. The fun party girl who wouldn't dream of missing a CSL happy hour is somehow content with spending most Friday nights carb-loading and resting up for long Saturday runs. I'm not using my credit card anymore, and am developing into a responsible spender (thanks in part to a new boyfriend who has pointed out the foolishness of financing a round of shots at the bar). And, this is the biggie-- I'm finally planning on making a long-term life change by buying a condo. I won't have a kick-ass city view anymore, but I will have 8,000 more dollars in my pocket thanks to the first-time homebuyers credit. It's responsible. But it's a big commitment that's scary, stressful, and I don't know how it will all turn out. For the first time in a long time, I'm taking big risks. The world is spinning fast again, and there's nothing else to do but hold on tight and enjoy the ride.
Friday, August 14, 2009
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
I'm back!
It's been so long since I've blogged, I'm not really sure where to start. So, here goes...
I pretty much still don't understand how three months ago, I ran 26.2 miles and now it takes everything out of me just to get up to running double-digit mileage. I started 3 weeks ago by planning to run 10 miles and I decided the best place to "get my feet wet" again was Lunken Aiport. Lunken has a lot of benefits for 10-mile runs: 1.) It's flat, flat, flat, 2.) It's a 5-mile loop so if you park in the middle, you can re-hydrate halfway through and 3.) Further to point #2, if you don't think you can run the whole 10, you can bail out and just run 5 (but feel like you suck). So, a few Sundays ago, I went out there and got down to business. I got through 5 miles fairly easily, and eked out the last 5 with some difficulty, but it wasn't too, too bad and boosted my confidence quite a bit, since I hadn't run that far since the marathon in May.
Once I had the first 10-miler under my belt, I felt confident enough to go run 9 miles with my Meters & Miles group the following Saturday. I did everything right -- had a good high-carb dinner, rested my legs Friday, and got to bed early. When I woke up at 6:00 a.m., it was pouring rain and I heard rumbles of thunder and flashes of lightening. "Okay," I thought, "We're probably not meeting for the run." I turned off my alarm and rolled over and went back to sleep. About a half hour later, nature called, so I got up and looked out the window. It was like I woke up on a completely different day! There was no rain, and the sky was only partly cloudy. I checked out weather.com, and it verified that the rain had passed temporarily and wouldn't start again until after noon.
I hemmed and hawed about what to do. I wanted to run because I had planned to run and prepared well for it, the weather was great (especially for mid-July) and I was ready to go. After screwing around for 45 minutes on Map My Run looking for a decent 9 or 10 mile route, I reluctantly chose to head back to Lunken. In doing so, I also made a promise to myself to try to be more adventurous in trying out new routes in the future.
I wanted to change things up a little from the previous week as not to get bored, so when I got to Lunken I parked at the airport instead of at the beginning of the trail on Wilmer. I almost decided to run the loop counter-clockwise to mix it up even more, but I decided not to get too crazy. I fed the parking meter (which I'm not sure you even have to do there on Saturdays, but best to err on the side of caution, I figured) and off I went. The first 5 miles were fairly easy again, but once I got back to my car for loop 2, I saw an ominous black sky in the distance. I decided to go for it anyway... maybe I could outrun it?
As you may have already guess, it turns out I couldn't run faster than the giant cloud of doom (though it certainly caused me to pick up the pace quite a bit) and at 7 and 1/2 miles in, the rain started to drip-drip. By mile 8, I was running through a torrential downpour. I honestly felt like I was in the middle of a hurricane. Stupid weather.com and it's innacurate forecast.
One other cute sidenote from my run in the rain... As soon as the rain started falling, I had to laugh at my iPod Shuffle's sense of irony. Despite being on the "random" setting, this song came on. Jamming out to Superchick and sloshing my way back to my car, it occured to me that I should have been miserable right then. I wasn't -- I loved every splishy-splashy second of it. It reminded me of just how much I love running.
With renewed energy after my second Lunken run, I made a plan to run 14 miles with my group last Saturday. If you're thinking that stepping up from 10 to 14 miles in one week is too ambitious, you are correct. Despite my best effort, I only got through 11 1/2 of the 14 (and the last mile was torture). Luckily, Bill from our group (the "waterboy" for this run) was able to drive me back to my car so that I didn't have to walk the last 2 1/2 miles. (This is one of the perks of running with a group.) I felt a little defeated after not making the whole 14, but seeing as I'm not actually training for a full marathon, and the half marathon I am doing isn't for another month and a half, I feel really good about my progress.
I do not, however, feel good about how much ice cream I've been eating lately. Luckily I am back to running enough to counteract the effects of all the turtle sundaes, but jeez... I really have a problem.
I pretty much still don't understand how three months ago, I ran 26.2 miles and now it takes everything out of me just to get up to running double-digit mileage. I started 3 weeks ago by planning to run 10 miles and I decided the best place to "get my feet wet" again was Lunken Aiport. Lunken has a lot of benefits for 10-mile runs: 1.) It's flat, flat, flat, 2.) It's a 5-mile loop so if you park in the middle, you can re-hydrate halfway through and 3.) Further to point #2, if you don't think you can run the whole 10, you can bail out and just run 5 (but feel like you suck). So, a few Sundays ago, I went out there and got down to business. I got through 5 miles fairly easily, and eked out the last 5 with some difficulty, but it wasn't too, too bad and boosted my confidence quite a bit, since I hadn't run that far since the marathon in May.
Once I had the first 10-miler under my belt, I felt confident enough to go run 9 miles with my Meters & Miles group the following Saturday. I did everything right -- had a good high-carb dinner, rested my legs Friday, and got to bed early. When I woke up at 6:00 a.m., it was pouring rain and I heard rumbles of thunder and flashes of lightening. "Okay," I thought, "We're probably not meeting for the run." I turned off my alarm and rolled over and went back to sleep. About a half hour later, nature called, so I got up and looked out the window. It was like I woke up on a completely different day! There was no rain, and the sky was only partly cloudy. I checked out weather.com, and it verified that the rain had passed temporarily and wouldn't start again until after noon.
I hemmed and hawed about what to do. I wanted to run because I had planned to run and prepared well for it, the weather was great (especially for mid-July) and I was ready to go. After screwing around for 45 minutes on Map My Run looking for a decent 9 or 10 mile route, I reluctantly chose to head back to Lunken. In doing so, I also made a promise to myself to try to be more adventurous in trying out new routes in the future.
I wanted to change things up a little from the previous week as not to get bored, so when I got to Lunken I parked at the airport instead of at the beginning of the trail on Wilmer. I almost decided to run the loop counter-clockwise to mix it up even more, but I decided not to get too crazy. I fed the parking meter (which I'm not sure you even have to do there on Saturdays, but best to err on the side of caution, I figured) and off I went. The first 5 miles were fairly easy again, but once I got back to my car for loop 2, I saw an ominous black sky in the distance. I decided to go for it anyway... maybe I could outrun it?
As you may have already guess, it turns out I couldn't run faster than the giant cloud of doom (though it certainly caused me to pick up the pace quite a bit) and at 7 and 1/2 miles in, the rain started to drip-drip. By mile 8, I was running through a torrential downpour. I honestly felt like I was in the middle of a hurricane. Stupid weather.com and it's innacurate forecast.
One other cute sidenote from my run in the rain... As soon as the rain started falling, I had to laugh at my iPod Shuffle's sense of irony. Despite being on the "random" setting, this song came on. Jamming out to Superchick and sloshing my way back to my car, it occured to me that I should have been miserable right then. I wasn't -- I loved every splishy-splashy second of it. It reminded me of just how much I love running.
With renewed energy after my second Lunken run, I made a plan to run 14 miles with my group last Saturday. If you're thinking that stepping up from 10 to 14 miles in one week is too ambitious, you are correct. Despite my best effort, I only got through 11 1/2 of the 14 (and the last mile was torture). Luckily, Bill from our group (the "waterboy" for this run) was able to drive me back to my car so that I didn't have to walk the last 2 1/2 miles. (This is one of the perks of running with a group.) I felt a little defeated after not making the whole 14, but seeing as I'm not actually training for a full marathon, and the half marathon I am doing isn't for another month and a half, I feel really good about my progress.
I do not, however, feel good about how much ice cream I've been eating lately. Luckily I am back to running enough to counteract the effects of all the turtle sundaes, but jeez... I really have a problem.
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